Player Comments on DRIVE
you suck
view more...
—
Ford
on 4/2/2024 12:40:00 AM with a score of 0
I won’t say a lot because it seems Wizzy is aware of a lot of the faults in his own story, mainly it being unfinished and riddled with SPAG errors, but I will say that I did like the uniqueness of the storygame and how knowledgeable he seems to be with guns. Though I did think the dialogue seemed a little juvenile at times and reminded me of certain young adult novels.
view more...
—
Suranna
on 5/10/2024 6:20:50 PM with a score of 0
The cyberpunk atmosphere to this story is well-realized. I like the description of the action and the back-and-forth banter between characters.
The spacing format is a little jarring for me as I need to do a lot of scrolling to get through pages, but that's just a personal preference.
The story does seem a bit rushed (makes sense for the contest deadline), which leaves a lot of questions regarding worldbuilding, the schizophrenic voice and the stakes of the conflict. I love the idea of another version of this story where the players gets to make more decisions during the race that affect her performance and position.
view more...
—
MiltonManThing
on 4/8/2024 4:33:10 PM with a score of 0
Action packed, fast paced, and vivid characterization. Wizzy has done well to capture attention here.
From what I could see, though, the story feels about 30-40% complete. I would like to read more about the brother, the worldbuilding, and the DRIVE competition itself. Unfortunate, but understandable as it was rushed out for the competition.
Definitely a good basis that needs much development and flesh. Good work.
view more...
—
PerforatedPenguin
on 4/3/2024 8:22:40 PM with a score of 0
3 typos, 1 minor continuity error. 1/8
view more...
—
WizzyCat
on 4/2/2024 12:35:30 AM with a score of 0
A great story, although I would have liked a little more character development, it was an enjoyable read! I'll say it again: great story!
view more...
—
benholman44
on 4/2/2024 12:09:45 AM with a score of 0
Close Window